Seriously. Buy some shit. Daddy needs a bailout.
Ever find yourself being questioned by people about your zombie-love? Do they think you're just a poseur? Do they question your motivations? Does this make you wish you had better friends? No? Is it just me? Never fear being mocked again! Just plonk down your Zombie Plus Loyalty Card and wave the naysayers off with hearty laugh, secure in the knowledge that you will die alone because you use words like "plonk".
Shout out to Sya for the linkage on that one.
Killing zombies is not only fun and educational, it's cardiopulmonary exercise. It's competitive. It's filled with danger and excitement. Holy crap! That sounds a lot like a sport! If only someone made uniforms! (hint: someone does)
Like to catch a little bit of zombie destruction on the weekends? Maybe like to get in a few rounds over your lunch break? Be proud to show your involvement in the war against the walking dead, and remember: get out there, have fun, and KILL AS MANY ZOMBIES AND VAMPIRES AS YOU CAN. This shirt is available with multiple levels of gore, so you can get it as bloodied (or unbloodied) as you'd like. Let me know if you have any special requests.
Each shirt comes with a custom name and any one- or two-digit number. Also available as a back option is the original slogan "KILL AS MANY ZOMBIES AND VAMPIRES AS YOU CAN", and the sleeve crest, which is modeled after the IZHL Patch.
All adults who have wet themselves have one thing in common: it happened when they tried to open the front door in Resident Evil and that dog cut-scene was triggered. Motherfuckers. I totally spilled that forty of Mickey's too.
But I digress.
In celebration of the t-virus and all the misery and soiled underwear it spawned I bring you the Zombie Repellent shirt.
You'd think that with a location name like Raccoon City, the residents would be more interested in running across streets in front of oncoming traffic and pilfering table scraps from trash cans. But nooo. They want more. Specifically, they want your brains. And since we only sell stuff for smart masses, your brains are probably especially filling.
Your best defense is a good offense. And we don't mean you should avoid bathing for a week. We mean you should be ready to empty your handy shotgun into masses of the undead at any given moment. Grenade launchers are nice and everything, but Resident Evil fans know your shotgun is your best zombie repellent in a pinch.
"Zombie Repellent" in neon green with a shotgun silhouette on the front of a black 100% cotton shirt. The back is decorated with a handful of shotgun shells above the caption "Resident Evil."
I propose that the next evolution in mobility will rival the Segway. May I be the first to coin it the Deadway?
It can totally climb steps.
Those were just a few of my favorites from ColorOverload.com. There's another 27 on the linked page and each shirt is linked to its manufacturer's site and most of the sites have other zombie paraphernalia. So, instead of wasting 30 minutes of your day watching YouTube vids, you can waste 30 minutes of your day browsing zombie merchandise! Progress!
